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Its a beautiful feeling...the act of giving, however the joy of receiving, that can never be over-stated...i haven't known anyone yet who does not love to receive gifts...mba! no! its a natural part of our lives. after all, we receive good air, naturally, everyday from the Most High. However, when it comes to material things, i know i always love to be on the receiving end of the gifts but over time I've come to appreciate the saying 'the hand that gives is always on top' which is reverse for the hand that receives and giving has assumed a new meaning for me.

i looked around me and observed that the people that give the most always seem to have (surplus)! They give regularly from what seems to be a bottomless pocket. it's actually like rocket science and somewhat illogical but i guess that's just the way it is. The first origins i could decipher is that giving a biblical concept 'for God loves a cheerful giver' 'give and it shall be given unto you, pressed down, rolling over and shaken together' and countless other quotes from the Bible illustrate indeed how in tune God is with giving. The more i began to embrace the concept of giving, the more I began to receive. I've not yet arrived oh @the giving bus-top but i know that i am not where I started from.

we should also realise that giving does not have to be material or monetary, we can give of our time, effort, gifts and it would have the same if not even more effect. Spare the time to share your monetary, physical, spiritual resources with those that not only need it but might find it difficult to repay you and the benefits there from will be un-quantifiable (is there a word like that? :) )

Giving is not a one-day concept; it grows over time and requires adequate nourishment. One of the best way to cultivate giving for a life-time is encouraging young children to share their toys and gifts especially with their peers. When a little child realises that her little 'Winnie the Pooh' doll could be shared with her little friend, allowing both of them to enjoy playtime in a more fun and happy manner, then she will refuse to hoard and slowly foster the idea of giving and happily so...

As we go out and about this weekend, we should decide to give a little of ourselves and make someone out there smile...just a little bit.

Enjoy!

prepare!!!

Its been a while...as usual :) I referred to myself as a reluctant blogger in an article i wrote recently and so true that is. I practically have to encourage myself to write although i definitely have so much to say! Anyways, the week is almost over and twas filled with ups and downs (as usual). However, had an interesting workshop during the course of the week on disaster preparedness for major sectors in the Nigeria (security, government, CSOs etc). Went in my capacity as an NGO person and it was indeed an eye-opener.

Like most things in Naija, it came at the wrong time. How do you prepare for something that is already upon you? The work for preparing for any disaster for 2013 both natural or man-made should at least begin at the start of the year not half way through???

Anyways, as with most things in Nigeria, the preparedness and response seem to come together at the same time *eye roll*. We can only hope that the year would end without any of the said 'emergencies' coming to pass! Amen!


I'm also on a mission to reconnect with lost/old pals....this has been on for quite a while but its progressing on schedule so any of those old/long-lost pals should definitely holla!!


Cheers to the weekend!!

proudly female!

Is there something wrong with female children? I really want some clarity here 'cos I've noticed that even in forums where women make requests for prayers for fruit of the womb, they end it with phrases such as *a male or son/sons*. In social gatherings, when it is announced that a woman has just given birth to a *bouncing baby boy*, the applause ehn! so much greater than if its a *baby girl*. Infact, women who birth male children feel so accomplished as though that's the answer to all their problems! That's why you'll see a woman with 5 or 6 female children still trying for the elusive male child! Haba! (Don't kill yourself nau, Madam)

For me, I believe that ALL children are gifts from God and female children more especially. I know the ideal is to have children of both sexes, but when this doesn't happen, you are still a complete man (woman). We need to remove the notion from our consciousness that male children are of greater value and are assets even more than females (remember the MTN advert 'mama na boy' that was pulled off just because of this same controversy). 

Infact, if you ask people that have only one sex of children, they'll tell you that female children are much more caring, compassionate and affectionate even after they get married than male children. So what are we talking about?? If we as women do not begin to speak out and advocate for our female children, pray, tell who is going to do it?

We know that the Nigerian society is not as favourably disposed to the female folk as it is to the male probably because of our patriarchal structure but we shouldn't contribute to maintaining this status-quo. Instead, we should be the voice of change and progress!! Forward ever, backward never!! :) 

PS: consider that the last three American presidents have had only girls, does that make Hilary, Laura or Michelle any less women? No O°˚, infact! Its not even an issue for the most important (politically) man in the world who has such an impressive and exclusive legacy to bequeath to his children so why should it now over-matter to Mr one bicycle and no farmland??!

the face...

This our face ehn….we take so much pride in it. That’s why we invest so much in make-up, hair, colours and of course, the almighty mirror! How exactly are we supposed to see that our beautifully-coiffured face without the aid of Ms clear and lovely mirror? Don’t get me wrong oh, I’ve always been a fan of the mirror, in fact one of her greatest fans. I had one in my every handbag, two in my car, in class, in the office, at church (yeah! gotta look good in the presence of God!), infact there’s one I carry almost everywhere and I never imagined that anything could EVER come between us.

That is until Friday the 18^th of February 2013. I had finished late from work that eventful evening, was so tired, in fact exhausted! I had been fantasising about what I was going to prepare to eat as soon I got home. Fried yam with chicken sauceJ or Spaghetti with minced meat sauce =-?. I like food that much oh, so once I arrived, I immediately set to work. But have you heard the phrase? ‘the best laid plans of men and mice’, or ‘man proposes, God disposes’, well that’s exactly what happened to me on that Friday.

So, I put the frying pan on the gas cooker, struck the match and lit the cooker; it wasn’t burning well so lil’ Ms engineer+ decided to adjust the gas head (while twas still burning), everything after that was a blur. The next thing I knew, there was a ferocious blue flame right in my face, then screams from my mom, neighbours shouting fire, fire. Well, the fire was put out and everything settled down. Everything that is, except my face. It felt very hot as though it was burning and gradually darkening.

The fine babe in me quickly kicked in, I went straight to the internet and checked out remedies for burns which I immediately applied. Shea butter, then honey and then aloe vera, what didn’t I try? But of course, it was too early to quantify the damage or even the effect of all the treatments I applied. The next morning I didn’t recognise my face and little Ms Mirror became an instant enemy. I couldn’t stand to look at my face or what it had become overnight. I still shudder to think of it.

The doctor’s prescription plus my own herbal remedies became a daily dose meant to restore my beautiful face back to its old glory. I became picture-shy, mirror-shy and in fact reflection-shy. It was a great lesson in patience and perseverance. My skin gradually began to peel, developing new flesh and the only thanks I could give was for my vitalizing, ebony skin J. What if I was fair skinned? (the horror!). Typically, there was a series of conflicting and sometimes hilarious information being given by all and sundry. Especially as someone who isn’t into the skill/art of make-up, my only prayer was for time to pass quickly because, as they say, time heals all wounds.

The waiting period wasn’t very palatable. I witnessed varying reactions from members of the general public, a lot of it negative, some even sported disgusted looks, also inquiring comments, advice etc. My face has improved greatly now and I have to specifically tell you about the incident before you notice any scar. I’m so glad and I take pictures at any opportunity now J. PS: forgot to mention that one of the advantages of the blaze was that every pimple on my face immediately cleared (is that vain? =D)

There were so many lessons I learnt during that time and I pray I don’t ever forget what it felt like (though its all becoming sort of a blur nowL). So despite any circumstance, pain, hurt you might be going through, just have faith that you’ll pull through because NOTHING, absolutely nothing lasts forever, no matter how bad, its just a phase and must surely pass. Remember…weeping may endure for a night, But joy comes in the morning…Psalm 30:5. Thank you! J

Ok! Its been a while, haven't come around here but the world has not stopped moving. While we are still trying to wrap our hands round one major event, another happens immediately after and we start again, it's a never ending cycle. For me the major event of the past weeks is the Boston Marathon bombing. Now, answers are sought as to what motivated two young men and Tsarnaev brothers; Dzhokhar, 19, and Tamerlan, 26 to plant twin bombs at the finish line of the Marathon injuring countless individuals and killing three including an 8 year old boy, Martin Richard; Chinese graduate student, Lingzi Lu and 29 year old Kristle Campbell.

While the world attempts to understand exactly what went wrong, it once again brings to the fore, the issue of home-grown terrorists with apparently no outside backing and the vulnerability of public places. Only God knows how many like individuals are plotting and planning another episode even while i type/you read. God help us!

We also had the Texas explosion at a fertilizer plant that killed scores of people, the cause of which is still being investigated. One silver lining was the story of the man who was at the venue of the Boston bombings, escaped death or injury and went back home to Texas, only to witness that explosion! Mr Joe Berti definitely has a lot to thank God for!

“It’s a miracle,” he said in an interview with The Associated Press on Thursday. “People keep saying, ‘Don’t you feel unlucky?’ and I was actually the opposite — saying not only do I not feel unlucky, but I feel blessed that my wife could be 10 yards from the explosion and not have a scratch.

So in the midst of all the chaos, there still so much to be thankful for.

On a lighter note, in Nigeria, number portability has finally been introduced. with none other then Saka (Afeez Oyetoro) as the first symbol of porting. He ported from advertising for Etisalat to MTN (from green to yellow). All of a sudden the advert is the talk of the town, the new oga@thetop-like craze. I loved the concept behind the advert. Simply communicated and Saka executed perfectly with his our port-ing moves! :) However, several questions have also arisen about violation of contract terms since he was advertising for two telcos in pretty much the same market. My take? Both parties would definitely have examined the issues of liability before getting entangled together, if they dont have a problem, why should i now? Them go pay me commission ni? Cannot take Panadol for another's headache jor! =D


Additional reports from thestar.com World



Takias!!

ok, so i'm trying to get a hang of this blogging business...not as easy as i thought oh.... there's some news, then some articles and even the diary-like write-up.

hmmn! the only thing i know is that i like to write and hopefully, eventually i will figure it all out!

*patience, patience*

LIVING IN A RUT OR...NOT

F

or me and I am sure for a lot of women out there, we have a picture perfect idea of the kind of life we want to live. Most definitely, a life of love with the near perfect husband, a wonderful job, a lovely home and beautiful children who come as and when we decide we are ready to welcome them, a great circle of supportive friends. Unfortunately, this is not usually the case as we obviously come to realise somewhere down the line. I am married to this wonderful man, I have a great job and two beautiful and boisterous children and did I mention a home complete with the proverbial white-picket fence. But on some really obscure level I still feel a teeny-weeny bit unfulfilled. I feel like I am in some sort of rut. Maybe it’s the famous (or infamous) mid-life crisis, (but I’m just 30?!). Maybe I am just lacking the necessary challenges, motivations which are sure to provide that constant adrenaline rush. Maybe and maybe and even more maybes.

 I know a whole lot of people who would give their right arms and even an additional leg just to be in my shoes. Friends, family and even foes congratulate me at every opportunity and tell me how lucky I am to be so blessed and fortunate to have all that I do at this point in my life.

A major thorn in my neck is that I cannot seem to find the most appropriate person to talk to. It has become like the proverbial saying expressed in my native language as ‘eni to ni ori, o ni fila’ which loosely translates to mean a person does not always appreciate what he has as against someone else who doesn’t have as much. Any one I try to confide in just has this expression of ‘oh, what an ingrate’ or ‘is she for real?’

You know it got so bad that I began rummaging through my husband’s medical journals, searching for the medical condition I seem to be suffering from but it appears to be non-existent unless and except I am the first person to be so afflicted, I’ve spoken to my pastor too, he just seems to think I should pray more and praise even more…

Don’t get me wrong, I actually feel very loved by God and enamoured of the mercies which he has chosen to bestow on little-known me. And beyond all this is the over-whelming realization that I am blessed beyond reason and above all my expectations. I am at the best period in my life and I must and should be thankful for that.

I have decided to make the choice that my being on this earth should be for the benefit of others too. There are so many people hurting out there and I feel I can reach out to help, improve their situations and the challenge of doing this might just be all I need.

I have come to realise that, possibly, the one way I can quench this seemingly unreasonable longing for constant stimulation is to reach out and touch the lives of those around me who are a little less fortunate or privileged. Come to think of it, my being on earth should not just be for me, myself and I, but for the benefit of others and spending time, money and effort with those kids in the orphanage in my neighbourhood or those health-challenged folks in the hospital down the road, orphaned and vulnerable children who are still discriminated against even in educated circles, learning about their lives, loves, challenges, happiness, sadness and looking for a means to make a difference positively could be even more therapeutic. This might just be the propellent for my own fulfilment in life and I can touch lives and make a difference along the way.

When the liturgy just isn't fun anymore

 i wrote this article for my church magazine a while back, but still see it as relevant after an event that happened last week...(that story is on its way oh :)

i titled it 'dis-enchantment with orthodox worship'

By orthodox, I mean traditional and in line with that I am referring to churches such as the Catholic, Anglican, Methodist, Baptist, Presbyterian denominations etc. Basically, churches where there is a stated procedure of doing things, there is a liturgy or program for services (either Matins or Holy Communion), the priests or pastors dress in a particular way and such similar things.

While growing up, it seemed as though all the people I knew fell into one of the above categories and of course as kids, we automatically fell in line with our parents. However today, it is very rare to find a youth i.e. 17-30yrs of age who professes to be Anglican or Presbyterian whole heartedly and is happily so. Rather there are more households like my cousins’- their father is catholic, their mother, apostolic and the kids are members of different Pentecostal churches (one is a winner, the other goes to Global Harvest and the third attends BLW). Why is this so? Is there something fundamentally wrong with orthodox churches or is Pentecostalism merely a passing fad?

I personally love my church and it happens to be an Anglican cathedral. This does not mean that I am ok or down with everything that goes on within the echelons of the church or even some of its practices, but I like the essence of the church, the hymns, doxology, liturgy, benediction etc which have formed a major part of my growing up years are actually some of the reasons that endears my heart to the church for example I can basically recite the Eucharistic prayer1 by heart! But come to think of it, this is a major reason why so many young people flee. They don’t like the whole repetitive, traditional, ritualistic services; the boring sermons with priests dressed in more clothes than the average street bum, and hymns? No way! Give way to Kirk Franklin, Mary Mary and the Winans Phase 2!

Coincidentally however, a lot of the so called traditional churches are evolving methods and means different from the hard core rigidity that characterizes their services, there is more flexibility in their worship, more youth oriented preachers are given centre stage. A major contention point used to be that of dressing. These churches are no longer as strict so that now a female doesn’t have to cover her hair and could also wear trousers which was hitherto frowned at.

It is possible today to enter a Methodist cathedral and the only difference with God will do it Ministries would be the edifice and possibly the priests. Orthodox churches that are refusing to comply are losing their youths faster than one can blink. What to do? The only solution I see now is for the older generation churches to make their churches youth-friendly. This is not to say that they should lose their essence. To appeal to the youths who constitute a huge percentage of our population, free worship sessions should be encouraged more often than the predictable and sometimes boring monotonous services. Whilst a more liberal approach is ok with regard to dressing, they should not go over board by compromising and permitting sin in form of outfits, also greater interaction should be encouraged between the congregation and the leadership.

Above all it should be borne in mind that worship devoid of Christ is no worship at all. So in making all these changes and more, the greatest emphasis should be placed on the pre-eminence of the triune God.     

News!! April 11th 2013

whats new on today's news? a lot!

should we begin from the North/South Korean standoff or the latest in the Nigeria/Boko Haram/amnesty triangle? No! Think there's so much of that out there already....Lets move to several interesting news stories gripping the world today:

Cuba/America Child abduction case (April 11th 2013)

In America, reminiscent of the Elias Gonzales hostage crises, a couple: Josh and Sharyn Hakken, reportedly kidnapped their two sons Chase and Cole from their maternal grandmother (Sharyn's mother) after breaking into her home and tying her up, before whisking the boys away. They sailed away to Cuba triggering an international manhunt that ended this week. Sadly for the couple, Florida laws are not too lenient on child abduction and they could end up spending the rest of their lives in prison after sentencing. 

A court had awarded custody of the boys to their grandparents and terminated the parent's parental rights due to the increasingly erratic and unsafe behaviour of the parents.

The Cuban government was instrumental in getting the children back home due to the extensive cooperation between the two countries....the beginning of a new era? Lets wait and see..:)


Its time for yet another Madonna/Malawi war of words (why cant both parties just remain in their respective homes)

Pop star Madonna is in yet another bitter dispute with the government of Malawi following her 'goodwill' visit to the nation earlier this week. She was accused of demanding a five-star reception on arrival in the country and over-stating her contributions to build schools. Madonna has had a seemingly love-hate relationship with Malawi after adopting two children son David Banda and daughter Chifundo James, from the African nation and several projects including a documentary 'I am because we are' highlighting disease devastating children in the nation.

Madonna's manager Trevor refuted these claims stating that Madonna is the largest individual philanthropist in Malawi and would continue to fund programmes that support children in the country.

Only time would actually tell exactly how this relationship ends...


A federal judge in America ordered the US Food and Drug Administration to make the morning after pill available to all girls of reproductive age, even without a prescription. The pill is usually taken by women after un-protected sex to prevent pregnancy. The ruling has undoubtedly given rise to differing opinions on the rightness or otherwise of the pronouncement.

As expected, reproductive and women's rights groups have hailed the ruling as a plus for females who should have the right over their bodies and choice of reproduction. Conservative groups have however decried the ruling as encouraging early sexual relations without fear of consequences.

The debate continues...

(Additional information obtained from www.CNN.com, BBCnews.com, Reuters.com)

teach us to number our days

sometimes, i wonder, when people die and leave loved ones behind....what exactly happens? People, friends and family mourn for like ten days, weeks, months, years? then what next? life goes on. same is true for even a natural tragedy, an earthquake, a tsunami, a plane crash...everyone is sad (for a while) and then they 'forget' and life goes on.

i lost an uncle some week ago and after the shedding of tears, calls, comfort....some days my thoughts go to him and the family he left behind and some days not....i guess, that's life....

After the Dana plane crash in June of 2012 in Nigeria, i penned some thoughts, which i now share...times and seasons have passed but the story remains constant. The most important thing is - how effective can we lives our lives here on earth being mindful all the time of the world to come and as they say in my church, *being earthly-impactful and heavenly-focused*.

Above all, i pray, *Lord teach us to number our days that we may apply our hearts to wisdom*. Have a beautiful week ahead. God bless you!

http://facebook.com/busola.idowu

From my facebook page 6th June 2012

I posted a comment yesterday about the transience of life and how there is very little that can be done to change the course of nature…it didn’t come out exactly that way, but that was the message I intended to convey. So many comments have been made, criticisms, insults, curses and a great deal of righteous indignation has followed the crash of the Dana Airlines Flight 9J 922. There is a renewed feeling, thought of how fickle life actually is, how in the blink of an eye, it could all be over…

When I leave this earth, the sun will not cease or even pause for a moment, the stars will not neglect to gleam at night, the clock will not stop…it would just be business as usual, for nature, for billions of people around the world who have no knowledge that I ever existed.

After the crash, there was such a great outpouring of grief and pain and hurt, broadcast messages, profile messages, display photographs showed just how affected we all were, then slowly, things have begun to return to normal…

Slowly, the pictures have begun to change to the pre-Dana portraits of happy, fulfilled individuals; the black, dark, sad images that characterized the period have started to give way; the BCs blaming government, Dana Airlines and even individuals who seemed to have had some sort of fore-knowledge of the crash, as well as those urging us to remember to ‘live each day as though it were the last’, have gradually been replaced by jokes and comments on ‘the meaning of Dana in Yoruba’, the relationship between the renaming of Unilag and Dana aircraft as well as so many similar ludicrous correlations that bear no relationship to the issue at hand.

Above all, my thoughts have not wavered from those who are mourning at this time, those for whom sleep has become a scarce craving, for whom weeping and wailing have become the only solace at this time. Friends of friends, uncles and aunts of friends, colleagues of friends, the list goes on. I know when this period is long forgotten and the crash has become a vague memory, it is these fathers, mothers, children, brothers and sisters that would be left to mourn. Birthdays, Christmases, jokes, TV shows, clothes, memories abound in every space.

The government? We wait and see; but alas we have done that so many times before (big sigh). You? I do not know. Me? I spare a prayer and a thought for all those who departed this earth unplanned, uncelebrated and unexpected and also for those they left behind. Joy, Levy, Maimuna, Ehime, Ayodele, Christopher, Amaka, Dunni, Adetunji, Obinna, Chima, Tope…the list goes on… what else can I say? It is well. Even when all else fails, that is the hope we cling to. God bless.

First!!!

First blog!!! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!! Exciting stuff!

What you can expect:

Interesting, newsy, entertaining, head-butting, informative and above all inspiring

When I start, y’all will beg me to stop…have so much to say and share

Please keep the faith with me as we start this journey

God bless you all!